What's Up For Today?

Miss Wendy's Texas Love Advice
Plus Some Occasional Comments on the
State of the Popular Culture

Ask Miss Wendy
L-R: Michael Mazocco, Wendy R. Williams, Armistead Johnson
Photo: Stephen Mosher

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Dear Miss Wendy,

I hate to complain but everywhere I look lately, people are just “having at it”: public bathrooms; under the table at nightclubs; dressing rooms in department stores; church pews, subway trains at night, all the usual places. I know this town is expensive, but can’t anyone afford to get a room anymore?

The Unwilling Voyeur

Dear Willie,

Of course no one can afford to “just get a room” anymore, there are very few assignations worth $300. Before I can answer your question in a satisfactory manner, I will need more information. Please give me the exact locations that you have noticed such lustful behavior – addresses, times of day, whether or not Miss Wendy will have to pay a cover charge etc. etc. I will get to the bottom of this.


Dear Miss Wendy,

I have recently moved to Washington D. C. from New York and am wondering if anyone has sex in Washington. So far I have seen no evidence.

Unwilling Transplant,

Dear Willie 2,

Of course there is sex in Washington (how else do you think they grow little Republicans), but most of it is dull enough to be covered in the Congressional Record. The real problem with sex in Washington is that when politicos finally get around to “doing it,” they are always taking off the wrong clothes.

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