Miss Wendy's Texas Love Advice
Plus Some Occasional Comments on the
State of the Popular Culture
L-R: Michael Mazocco, Wendy
R. Williams, Armistead Johnson
Photo: Stephen Mosher
Dear Miss Wendy,
Mercedes Benz Fashion Week starts
February 2nd and I would like to know about the
sexual aspects of fashion week. Is there any pow-wowing
in the tents?
Sincerely,
Voyeur
Dear Voy,
Well there will be a lot of pretty
little things walking down the runway (see through
blouses with no bra, thongs peeping through voile
for both men and women) but realistically, there
will be no sex.
The female models have not eaten
in about a month and if propositioned would probably
say something like, “Not now sweetie, but
why don’t you just talk dirty to me while
I do this line?” The male models have had
a little more to eat and might be a little more
interested, but are still likely to say something
like, “Oh that’s nice, but why don’t
you just get up and act as my spotter while I lift
these weights?” And the designers will brush
away any amorous efforts with a, “For heavens
sake, darlings! If you really want to be useful,
get up off your knees and make a Starbucks run!
Someone is going to trip over you and break a heel!”
You see, everyone at Fashion Week is an ascetic,
asexual alien; things are different in their world.
Dear Miss Wendy,
Are people still not having sex
in New Jersey?
Short Hills Hinnie
Dear Hinnie,
No, they are not. Driving
on the New Jersey turnpike destroys more than your
soul.
Do you have a Question for Miss Wendy?
Email her at newyorkcoolstuff@aol.com
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