Miss Wendy's
Texas Love Advice
Plus Some Occasional Comments on the
State of the Popular Culture

L-R: Michael Mazocco, Wendy
R. Williams, Armistead Johnson
Photo Credit: Stephen Mosher
The
Beat Goes On: There are three stories on
MSNBC.com that illustrate that we may be a nation
that cannot answer the quiz show question, "What
is common sense?" (1)The employees of a Burger
King in Missouri asked a mother to leave because
her six-month-old-baby was not wearing shoes, thus
violating the "No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service"
policy (MSNBC.com)
(2) an 81 year old woman in Mobile, Alabama was
arrested for public lewdness, handcuffed, and hauled
into the station for urinating in a public park
(she lost control of her bladder and could not make
it to a bathroom - MSNBC.com)
and (3) Harvard scholar Henry Gates was arrested
in his own home for becoming upset when the police
made him prove that he lived there and then refused
to identify themselves (MSNBC.com).
In all three cases, cooler heads soon prevailed,
apologies were issued and charges (when applicable)
were dropped. But all three of these could have
been avoided, if someone had just had the common
sense to say "Whoa, this story and my part
in it are going to look ridiculous on the nightly
news. Am I perhaps overreacting or "being an
ass?" But since mishegases like this feed my
column, I have to admit to reacting with glee when
I see officials of any kind throwing themselves
on their swords.
But my brother-in-law,
Sterling Essenmacher from Houston, Texas, always
advises, "Engage your brain BEFORE you open
your mouth."
Thank You
Sarah Palin: There
is a wonderful quote from Sarah Palin's farewell
speech. "It is as throughout all Alaska that
big wild good life teeming along the road that is
north to the future." I could just run up and
kiss her. No one can toss a word salad like our
Sarah. Every time this wonderful woman opens her
mouth, I have more fodder for my column.
Now don't think I want former Governor Palin to
ever hold elected office again (there may be no
danger of that), but please please, Sarah, keep
on talking.
Dear Miss Wendy,
It is August, and
I have not seen any socialites or celebrities in
the city. What is going on?
Sincerely,
Tulsa Tourist
Dear Tulsa,
Everyone who is anyone
in New York City is either in the Hampton's or in
hiding. The hot totties of NYC have made the city
into a small town. They run with a circle of friends
who tally up status on a daily basis just like they
were characters in a Jane Austen novel. So if one
of the characters in the real New York City reality
show cannot afford to make-it in the Hampton's,
they either stay home or go out in disguise.

Taylor Momsen Singing with
her Band, The Pretty Reckless
Taylor Momsen's Birthday Party Presented by MySpace
Hiro Ballroom at The Maritime Hotel / New York City
July 28, 2009
Janet Mayer / PR Photos
The Beat Goes
On: Madonna and Lady Gaga need to look over their
shoulder and hear the hoof beats of Miss Taylor
Momsen, the blonde hot mess from Gossip Girl
who has just debuted her new band, The Pretty Reckless.
Miss Courtney Love, who has not been in the news
lately (no jail, no rehabs), has managed to piggy-back
off Momsen's buzz by starting a feud (see MTV.com)
which will give both Momsen and Love a bucket load
of free publicity. Why pay for publicity when you
can just tackle the competition and create a fun
story for all the media (including Miss Wendy) to
cover?
Hey, we are media
sluts and we always fall for it.
But here is
a promise to return to more adult conversation tomorrow.

Actress Bai Ling
IAKONA / PR Photos
The
Beat Goes On: Kudos to actress Bai Ling for
creating her own look; the girl always looks smashing.
Now not everyone can get away with this outfit,
so if you weigh more than a fifth eighth grader,
don't even think about it.
P. S. Even though
few women can wear this look, we are all going to
be tempted to buy over-the-knee boots this fall.
NeimanMarcus.com.
Quick
Question: Has Jon Gosselin forgotten that
he is actually the father of the eight children
on his tv show or does he simply consider those
children to be his costars? Everyday there seems
to be some tabloid report about Gosselin's new Manhattan
digs (the kids live in Pennsylvania), his trips
to Europe to confer with fashion designers and his
on and off again romances with two women.
And most of these
tabloid reports just refer to him as a single man
living a single lifestyle. I would love to see how
the tabloids handled it if his soon-to-be-ex wife
Kate so much as met a man at the local Pizza Hut.
Sure divorced parents
are entitled to a little fun, but once you are the
father of eight children under the age of eight,
your life should be over until the last one leaves
for college. Hey Man: You are not one of the kids,
you are the father to EIGHT children. So there.
And if love and a
sense of responsibility don't motivate Gosselin
to do a better job of being a parent, perhaps he
should think ahead to the future possibility that
one or more of those grown up children might decide
to produce and star in their own "Daddy Dearest"
reality show. His new BFF, Michael Lohan (father
to Lindsey), should be able to fill him in on how
much fun it is to be considered a pariah by your
own children.
Post
Script: I wrote this bit where I wagged my
finger and went nah, nahdy, nah, nah at Jon Gosselin
and then I thought: Whoa! Gosselin's shenanigans
are being orchestrated by the producers of The Learning
Channel who have served up this mishegas, packaged
and with a bow. Christian Audiger must have begged
(or paid) to be thrown in to the middle of this
made-for-media scandal. Why pay for advertising
when you can create a story and the media will cover
it for free? And I fell for it hook, line and sinker.
When will I finally totally get it that Reality
TV has nothing to do with reality? Game, match,
set The Learning Channel.
Amy Winehouse
Solarpix / PR Photos
The Beat
Goes On: There is
good news out of London. Miss Amy Winehouse went
to the City of Westminster Magistrates Court in
London on July 23, 2009 to faces assault charges
for allegedly punching a fan (who asked to take
a photo with her) in the eye. And our dolled-up
Miss Winehouse was acquitted. There is no news,
however, on what part Winehouse' hair may have played
in the melee. Was Winehouse even able to see the
fan or was the fan whacked when Winehouse suddenly
moved her beehive? Style points to Miss Winehouse,
however, for nailing the rocker chic goes to
court look.

The Veronicas
Robin Wong / PR Photos
Here is a You
Got It Going Girl(s) Award for the Australian
singing sensation, the Veronicas. They are moving
up the pop charts plus they are just plain cool
looking.
theveronicas.com
The
Beat Goes On: There is good news out of South
Carolina. Disgraced Governor Mark Sanford has written
an op-ed column for the South Carolina newspapers
which declared that God will make him better. I
am so relieved, but considering all the extremely
important issues that require God's help these days
- war, famine and pestilence - perhaps Sanford should
help God by cleaning up his act.
Bless
you Sarah Palin: Soon-to-ex-Governor
Sarah Palin has announced that she is ready to be
unleashed and will be twittering away as soon as
she is through with Alaska (CNN.com).
This is great news for this column (and perhaps
for Alaska), but if anyone has been able to figure
out which language she speaks (Palinese?), please
advise.

David Beckham
2009 Soccer - LA Galaxy and Red Bulls Press Conference
W Hotel in New York
July 15, 2009
Janet Mayer / PR Photos
The
Beat Goes On: Here is a You Got it Going
Girl (Guy) Award for Mr. David Beckham who
is definitely a candidate for People Magazine's
"Sexiest Man Alive." There was a rumor
on the street that Beckham and Angelina Jolie were
going to be featured in the latest Armani underwear
ads (the sexy ones with the stars stripped down
to their skivvies). Beckham has squelched that rumor
which is very good news for Victoria Beckham and
Brad Pitt and not such good news for the voyeuristic
public.
Do you have a Question
for Miss Wendy?
Email her at wendy@newyorkcool.com
All of Miss Wendy's
old columns are in the New York Cool Archive Section:
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/April/ask.html
htttp://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/March/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/February/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/January/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/December/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/November/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/October/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/September/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/August/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/July/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/April/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/March/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/February/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/January/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/December/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/November/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/October/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/August/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/July/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/April/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/March/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/February/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2007/January/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/December/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/November/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/October/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/September/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/August/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/July/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/April/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/March/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/February/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2006/January/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/December/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/November/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/October/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/September/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/August/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/July/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/April/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/March/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/February/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2005/January/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/December/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/November/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/October/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/September/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/August/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/July/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/June/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/May/ask.html
http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2004/April/ask.html
|