New York Cool - Ask Miss Wendy - Miss Wendy's Texas Love Advice

New York Cool: In this Issue

	what's up for today!
	about town
	fashion / style
	film
	miss wendy
	music
	theater
	home

Listings:

	arts
	broadway theater
	cabaret \| comedy
	clubs
	dance
	events
	film
	music
	off broadway theater
	off off broadway theater
	submit listings

New York Cool:

	archives
	advertise with us
	contact us
	join our mailing list
	work for us

Ask Miss Wendy - Miss Wendy's Texas Love Advice to New York's Sexually Challenged

Miss Wendy's Texas Love Advice
Plus Some Occasional Comments on the
State of the Popular Culture

Ask Miss Wendy
L-R: Michael Mazocco, Wendy R. Williams, Armistead Johnson
Photo Credit: Stephen Mosher

The Beat Goes On: The news lines are spilling the leaked story that Levi Johnson (Sarah Palin's NOT son-in-law) has posed for Playgirl with nothing but a hockey stick. Inquiring minds simply must know: Just where did they place the hockey stock? We are all atwitter.

P. S. Many kudos to ex-Governor Palin for telling Oprah that Levi would be welcome for Thanksgiving dinner. That was both a publicity coup (Palin appears magnanimous) and a marvelously evil dig.

Rumination on Pretty Girls Looking Bad: I have been walking the streets of New York City, viewing the fashion-disaster-behind screated by the new/old legging craze. Leggings were "the thing" in the 80's, but by the 90's they had disappeared because too many thunderous thighs were being stuffed into leggings and sausage casings have never been fashionable. But now I am talking about tall pretty women who should look good in almost anything, who have created a "background" problem for themselves by wearing their leggings with skimpy knit dresses that stop at the top of their thighs and cling to their bottoms, thus creating a "rounded" image that I am sure these women would be appalled to see in a three- way mirror. Some are even exacerbating the problem by wearing jackets that stop at the waist, emphasizing their basketball-in-a-baby-blanket look. It does not matter how thin the girl is; thin girls end up with "unfilled" rolls of legging material bunched at the top of their thighs. Two more inches of skirt fabric (denim, not knit) in a skirt that flared out, not in, and these women would look fabulous. Hey, if looking good were easy, we would all do it.

Jon Hamm of Mad Men
Albert L. Ortega / PR Photos

Ruminations: Last night was the season's final for Mad Men, one of television's finest shows. It was brilliant, starting in the the morass of the failing Draper marriage and ending with the birth of a new Sterling Cooper, the return of Joan (how does anyone manage without a Joan in their life?) and Don beginning his new life in Manhattan (how long before the school teacher appears?). Mad Men is available on demand, so don't wait. Everyone needs a little Madness.

P. S. Does anyone besides me think Betty is terminally stupid to run off with the next alpha-male-with-good-hair who becomes smitten with her cool Grace Kelly looks. No investigation, only "you'll do" and out the door she goes. Here's my spoiler: The Henry Francis gig won't last; fairy tales don't exist.

From Miss Wendy to her readers: It is starting to get cold in New York so check out this article on Budget Travel.com titled World's Best Affordable Hotels - We scoured the globe until we found the 31 best new hotels for under $150. If you can't afford to physically travel, let your mind take a trip.

Dear Miss Wendy,

Is it possible to purchase a sexy winter hat?

Sincerely,

Shivering Fashionista

Dear Shivers,

No.

Hot Tip: We are just about to go into the holiday flying season so here is a "word to the wise." There is a horrifying article on MSNBC.com about a couple in Phoenix who were arrested for stealing over 1,000 pieces of luggage from the airport carousel. Now, this problem could be easily avoided if the airports would resume checking luggage tags before allowing passengers to leave with "their" luggage. Instead they advise people to go quickly to the carousel after getting off the plane. But this advise is meaningless to people who are traveling with young children and have to wait to have their gate-checked strollers brought up from the hold or for the elderly infirm who need to wait for a wheel chair or even for Miss Wendy who needs to visit the ladies. Unfortunately, I have no advice except to suggest that you give everyone gift cards and pack your black, no-muss, rollable knit outfits in a carry-on. But please, please, don't wear that awful "travel dress." I might be on the plane with you and I simply can't stand it.

P. S. If you have a black bag and simply must check it, tie a yarn bow on the handle. You may look a little silly while carrying the bag, but nowhere near as silly as you will look spending your vacation in your traveling outfit because your bag made one more trip around the carousel and was snatched. No one should be forced to vacation without their fabulosity kit.

Lady Bunny
"Can It!" Charity Event to Mark the 70th Anniversary
of VIPP Waste Cans
Design Within Reach in New York City
October 28, 2009
Janet Mayer / PR Photos

The Beat Goes On: New York really deserves an award for Best Drag Queens. Manhattan boasts downtown denizens like Lady Bunny and the drag queen muses - The Upper East Side Ladies Who Lunch. And since I am from Texas, the home of blonde hair and pasty pearls, I can rightfully appreciate both.

Dear Miss Wendy,

Is it possible to purchase a a sexy-looking down coat?

Sincerely,

New York Shivers

Dear Shivers,

No.

Betsey Johnson
Betsey Johnson Store at Planet Hollywood Hotel and Casino
Las Vegas, Nevada
October 24, 2009
PRN / PR Photos

The Beat Goes On: Here is one of Miss Wendy's You Got It Going Girl Awards for Miss Betsey Johnson. Johnson is a sixty-plus grandmother who rocks the runway, cart wheeling down the aisle and then dancing back up while carrying her adorable granddaughter. Johnson is a Rock Princess who keeps on sparkling.

The Beat Goes On: Oh my, oh my, oh my. The camera addicted Jon Gosselin has now decided that he is Jewish. And all over the world, Jews are asking (in the words of The Godfather's Don Corleone, "Why come to me? What have I done to deserve such generosity?"

Ruminations: What do Jon Gosselin, his bff Michael Lohan (Lindsey's father) and the helium balloon family have in common? They were all bitten by the celebrity bug and have become addicted. They are modern day Norma Desmonds (Billy Wilders' Sunset Boulevard) constantly crying "All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up." These camera chasing buffoons have never learned one vital fact: When the media Gods shine their cameras on you, you should always look for the jar of mustard they are carrying in their other hand.

Bai Ling
PR Photos

The Beat Goes On: Kudos once again to starlet Miss Bai Ling for making herself into a rolling piece of pop art. Whether you like her look or not, you have to admit, "That girl's got style."

Hey, what did you wear to work today?

Where the Wild Things Are: Congratulations to Miss Madonna for maintaining her rocker chic mystique. The fifty-year-old Material Girl's neighbors are attempting to evict her from her Central Park West apartment for playing loud music and jumping up and down on the floor (the bed?). And these whiny neighbors did not once consider that it could have been the Pop Queen's children, either the little ones or the twenty-something one she is dating. Oh no, these complaining Manhatannites immediately knew which kid was yelling, "Let the wild rumpus start," and it was our darling Madonna.

Dear Miss Wendy:

Which neighborhood is the coolest neighborhood in New York?

Sincerely,

Manhattan Bound

Dear Manhattan,

It is the one where where you are you when you are there.

Great Advise I Recently Overheard: Take time to construct your happy times because the bad times will create themselves.


Prince Pixplanete / PR Photos	Rihanna Pixplanete / PR Photos

The Beat Goes On: Here is a bit to make your smile - Prince and Rihanna gilding their lillies to attend the Paris Fashion Week Spring/Summer 2010 Chanel Show on October 6, 2009. In the (non-abusive) words of Kanye West, they "believe in their flyness."

Ruminations on wearing black: I walk the streets of our city surrounded by a sea of black. Black and black, black and gray - New York City is the only city where wearing a khaki rain coat counts as a "splash of color." A fashion loving friend of mine recently moved to New York from the south. When I told her that she needed to buy only black clothes, she pooh-poohed me. But now, one year later, she is suitably attired to be a stage burglar (scene changer) for a Broadway show. New York does that to you. I have three sets of clothes, one I use in NYC and the clothes I wear in LA and Austin. They really don't mix - the Austin wardrobe is grounded by a palette of khaki green; the LA clothes colored like an psychedelic Easter basket. New Yorkers are like the women flying into Saudi Arabia who they don their burkas the minute they enter Saudi air space.

Hey, we have a uniform and we wear it cruz it won't show what you just sat in on the subway.

Do you have a Question for Miss Wendy?
Email her at wendy@newyorkcool.com

All of Miss Wendy's old columns are in the New York Cool Archive Section:

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/September/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/August/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/July /ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/June/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/May/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/April/ask.html

htttp://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/March/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/February/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2009/January/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/December/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/November/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/October/ask.html

http://www.newyorkcool.com/archives/2008/September/ask.html