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Ken Kwapis's
Big Miracle
Opens Friday, February 3, 2012
Screenwriter: Jack Amiel, Michael Begler,
from Thomas Rose's book "Free the Whales"
Starring: Drew Barrymore, John Krasinski,
Kristen Bell, Dermot Mulroney, Tim Blake Nelson, Vinessa
Shaw, Ted Danson
Universal Pictures/ Working Title
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
Politics makes strange bedfellows. Who
would have thought that so many individuals with different
cultures and conflicting ideologies could unify in the
remote northern regions of Alaska, all working toward
the same goals albeit for different reasons? Ken Kwapis
does a great job in recreating what must have been covered
in one way or another by the National Geographic Channel,
employing the big screen to milk audience emotions in
a movie that bears some of the tensions you might expect
in a thriller. The film boasts a PG rating from the MPAA
(there might of been a time that "hell" and
"damn" would not have garnered such liberality).
Big Miracle, with a screenplay by Jack Amiel
and Michael Begler from Thomas Rose's Free the Whales,
is inspired by a true story that riveted an international
TV audience in 1988.
Sentimental to a T, Big Miracle
finds an oil man, J.W. McGraw (Ted Danson), environmentalist
Rachel Kramer (Drew Barrymore), a flock of local Iñupiati
people, and a group of Soviets on a barge, all putting
aside their considerable differences to save three whales
trapped under ice. The group had only days to cut a large
gap in the ice before the small opening through which
the whales surface and breathe would freeze over. In temperatures
ranging from -40 to -70 Fahrenheit, a local newsman Adam
Carlson (John Krasinski) and a TV reporter imported from
L.A. (Kristen Bell) together with her boss (John Michael
Higgins) would take part in an adventure that captured
the inputs of President Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachov.
With the assistance of the Alaska National Guard called
out by Governor Haskell (Stephen Root) and led by Col.
Scott Boyer (Dermot Mulroney), the would-be saviors are
cheered on by local native Malik (John Pingayak) and his
extroverted grandson Nathan (Ahmaugak Sweeney).
What does a local newsman do for warmth
in this sort of weather? This questions allows director
Ken Kwapis to trot out Drew Barrymore's Rachel, a Greenpeace
volunteer who is less than diplomatic toward the people
with the power to save the three whales. Rachel is a woman
who was dumped some time back by newsman Adam, who will
obviously connect once again with the woman who, he says,
drives him crazy. As for the whales, they look realistic
enough, but are animatronic creations made a world away
in Auckland, New Zealand, but who have too many worries
about survival to remember their names--baby Bamm Bamm,
mother Wilma and daddy Fred. Why do Eskimos, who spear
and eat whales (although not the gray whales in the cast);
an fellow for whom Alaska means nothing more than a place
to drill for oil; a Soviet barge during the icy days of
the Cold War; the President of the United States; and
an environmentalist all doing working together? Only Rachel
Kramer is sincere in her love for the big creatures: for
the others, it's all PR, but who cares? As long as they
get the job done.
We do learn something about the local
culture and about geography. Barrow, Alaska is in the
big state's northwest, presumably an area that gets 24
hours of light in the summer and 24 hours of darkness
in the winter. We get the impression that the Inuit people
would have it no other way: in fact in assembling the
cast, the producers auditioned the locals throughout the
state, folks who speak different languages depending on
their tribes. Small fry who see the movie will be most
impressed by young Ahmaugak Sweeney as the hotshot grandchild,
a true capitalist who takes advantage of the increased
population to charge $20 for a piece of cardboard on which
to stay while the local hotel, hardly a Sheraton, is getting
$500 a night--no credit cards accepted.
Cameos taken from 1988--Tom Brokaw and
Dan Rather, for example--give the movie an added authenticity,
though Ted Danson's rectangular glasses were probably
unknown before the 1990s. Corny? Perhaps. But given that
the action is on a huge screen and not on your 55-inch
Sony gives the story all the punch, the humor, the sentimentality
that it needs. And who knows? Maybe some of us will put
aside our BlackBerries to find out more about our fellow
Americans who'd rather live in Seward's Icebox than down
in Florida.
Rated PG. 107 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Dori Berinstein's
Carol Channing: Larger Than Life
Opens Friday, January 20, 2012 in LA; February 3, 2012
in NY
Screenwriter: Dori Berinstein, Adam
Zucker
Cast: Carol Channing, Barbara Walters,
Debbie Reynolds, Lily Tomlin, Tyne Daly
Entertainment One US/ Dramatic Forces
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
If you're a diehard fan of Broadway,
happy to shell out over $100 for a decent seat to a musical
and the equivalent amount discounting inflation way back,
you're the perfect audience for Dori Bernstein's Carol
Channing: Larger Than Life. Ms. Channing, now ninety
years old and still able to get up on the stage, take
some reminiscent steps with adoring younger actors, dominates
the documentary which is all to the good. We don't need
yet another non-fiction work featuring people with knowledge
of a person but nary a look at the subject. Instead Berinstein's
film features the title character everywhere, in notably
archival flashes of the stage work in her signature musical,
Hello Dolly. The pacing is swift, the animated Hirschfeld
drawings a marvel of technology, the commentators not
overstaying their welcome.
Channing is one entertainer who proves
that one can make it big in the entertainment world with
a raspy voice, huge saucer eyes, and lips puffier than
Angelina Jolie's. She accepts the accolades of ordinary
folks on the streets of Manhattan and L.A. almost with
surprise that so many recall her past work, talking without
hesitations or "you know"'s or "kind of"
or other speech peculiarities as though she were relating
experiences that occurred just the other day. In her most
humorous aside, she notes that Yul Brynner once begged
her not to remind the public that she beat his own record
of 5,000 performances in The King and I, but
now that Brynner is no longer with us "I don't think
he'll mind."
In one of the most unusual romances
imaginable, she gets together with the sweetheart she
knew and set aside in junior high school at the age of
twelve, a relationship that took seventy years to make
her and Harry Kullijian realize that they should have
remained together forever. She notes with poignance that
she spent 42 years miserably married to Charles Lowe,
a man who ruled every aspect of her life.
Interview subjects--none of whom has
a bad word about her (though Channing makes a caustic
comment about the casting of Barbra Streisand in Hello
Dolly--include Barbara Walters, Tyne Daly, Jerry
Herman (who saved Dolly when it almost expired
in Detroit), Lily Tomlin, and Debbie Reynolds. There are
even cameos by Arnold Schwarzenegger, Ronald Reagan, Jimmy
Carter and Lyndon Johnson. Larger Than Life could
not be a more apt subtitle for the doc.
Rated PG. 87 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New Yorl

Baltasar Kormákur's
Contraband
Opens Friday, January 13, 2012
Universal Pictures
Reviewed for New York
Cool by Harvey Karten
Screenwriter: Aaron Guzikowski, adapted
from the Icelandic film Rejkjavik-Rotterdam
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Kate Beckinsale,
Ben Foster, Giovanni Ribisi, Lukas Haas
It is tempting to say that Contraband
is full of plot holes, but the story is so convoluted,
with so many scene changes picked up by photographer Barry
Ackroyd's shaky hands, that what remains is more a set
of scenes missing a narrative flow. The framework, however,
is clear enough, "one last job."
Chris Farraday (Mark Wahlberg), married
to Kate Farraday (Kate Beckinsale) and father of two kids,
needs to bail out his young and stupid brother-in-law,
Andy (Caleb Landry Jones). Andy made a mess of a smuggling
job, importing ten pounds of cocaine for drug lord Tim
Briggs (Giovanni Ribisi). After ditching the bag of drugs
at sea when customs boarded the boat, he comes home empty-handed.
Andy is then threatened with death unless he digs up the
money within a couple of weeks, but not only that: Chris,
Chris's wife Kate, and their two kids are threatened as
well. To make good on the debt Chris, a former smuggler
gone straight with a security business of his own, must
return to a life of crime by bringing in a fortune in
counterfeit currency from Panama.
The film is adapted by Baltasar Kormákur
from the 2008 movie in which he starred, Reykjavik-Rotterdam,
which showed that some Icelanders as a violent bunch intent
on smuggling booze. (That movie received no reviews on
Rotten Tomatoes and two on the internet movie database.)
The action here takes place in New Orleans, in Panama,
and on a boat under its captain (J.K. Simmons--who, rumor
has it, begged for a role as a tough guy). Chris's job
is to load tens of millions of counterfeit dollars onto
a ship under the noses of the crew, some of whom are in
on the job, and to get the loot past customs, which, on
a tip, is making a thorough search in the Port of New
Orleans. Gradually Chris finds out that his best friend,
Sebastian Abney (Ben Foster) may not be the trustworthy
pal he took him for.
You could say the movie is targeted
toward those with ADD, folks who cannot tolerate gazing
at a single scene for more than five seconds. The violence
and most of the action dealing with the smuggling operation
is photographed so swiftly that one wonders just how the
intricate details are executed. Mark Wahlberg once again
demonstrates his biceps as well as his character's blue-collar
culture and principles: he drinks beer at a friend's wedding,
he kisses his wife on the dance floor, he is taking on
a job not to enrich himself but to bail his brother-in-law
out of a mess. Nor would he consider smuggling drugs.
But the dialogue runs to four-letter words (Kate Beckinsale
is not too prim to use her share), car crashes and flying
fists, in short what insiders and some general audiences
know is the stereotypical January entry.
Rated R. 109 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Dominique Abel, Fiona
Gordon and Bruno Romy's
The Fairy (La Fée)
Opens Friday, February 24, 2012
Screenwriter: Dominique Abel, Fiona
Gordon, Bruno Romy
Starring: Dominique Abel, Fiona Gordon,
Bruno Romy, Philippe Martz, Vladimir Zorano, Destiné
M'Bikula Mayemba, Wilson Goma
Kino Lorber
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
No cinephile could possibly watch this
movie without thinking of Jacques Tati (1908-82), a French
director, who may well have been the inspiration for the
Belgo-Canadian-French directors of The Fairy.
Tati's theme, like that portrayed by Buster Keaton, is
that individual personality is warped by unfeeling organizations--which
the principal characters try to overcome. In The Fairy,
Dom (Dominique Abel) is a romantic who appears bewildered
by the world, an impression he gives in the very opening
scenes as he rides a bicycle in his town, Le Havre, during
a rainstorm and develops a flat tire that forces him to
carry the bike to work. As in Tati's movies, filmmakers
Dominique Abel, Fiona Gordon and Bruno Romy have set up
absentminded characters who are emotionally suffering,
yet their very suffering makes us laugh. (Would you laugh
at or with a man who is virtually blind and who keeps
bumping into walls? You might, if you're into this film.)
Abel, Gordon and Romy's previous work,
Iceberg, dealt with a couple with clone-like
children who went about life like robots while their Rumba
was about Fiona and Dom, a happy couple with a passion
for Latin dancing, their lives turned upside down by a
car accident. If The Fairy were part of a trilogy
(it isn't), this could be called a prequel: we find out
how Dom and Fiona meet.
Dom (Dominique Abel) is a night clerk
at a run-down hotel in Le Havre who is regularly interrupted
from consuming his bologna and ketchup sandwich on white
bread (French food?) by the phone or by buzzers from the
entrance. An English tourist (Philippe Martz) asks for
a room, using a French guide-book to Monte Python-esque
humor, is told that no dogs are allowed (he has a lively
West Highland terrier), but finds a way to solve that
problem. Dom's life changes when he meets Fiona (Fiona
Gordon), barefoot and possibly an escapee from a mental
institution, who claims that she is a witch and offers
him three wishes. She is, in fact, what she claims albeit
with limited powers: she has given wings to another gentleman,
but that guy falls gently to the ground. She has sex protected
by a large clamshell and becomes pregnant, her stomach
expanding moments later. The couple order beer from a
nearly-blind bartender (Bruno Romy) whose eyeglasses reach
all the way into the foam. And a group of illegal immigrants
ask to be taken to England.
The emphasis is on visual humor rather
than dialogue. Elements of magical realism include Dom
and Fiona's shedding of clothes to romp for a long period
under water. They have adventures with their new baby,
who is set up on top of the trunk of an old Mercedes,
following the cherub on a scooter and attempting to gather
the tyke up. We wonder how cameraman Jean Christophe Leforestier
films that scene, as it includes a death-defying leg stretch
by Fiona Gordon, one foot on the scooter, the other on
the trunk of the car in front of it.
The Fairy will go down easily
on those who like Buster Keaton and slapstick in general.
It is not my Crème brûlée The whimsy
can become tiresome, but I'd be churlish to pan the film
because of my strictly personal proclivities.
Unrated. 93 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Joe Carnahan's
The Grey
Opens Friday, January 27, 2012
Screenwriter: Joe Carnahan, Ian Mackenzie
Jeffers
Starring: Liam Neeson, Dermot Mulroney,
Frank Grillo, James Badge Dale, Joe Anderson
Open Road Films
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
Ironically on the day of the screening
I attended, the Wall Street Journal noted that the most
recent study of airline efficiency cited Alaska Airlines
is a winner in many categories. But in the film, The
Grey, the folks taking a plane from their oil rig
work site to Anchorage (actually filmed beautifully by
Masanobu Takayangi) had the bad luck to crash.
The Grey is a horror tale,
a character study making good use of ensemble acting,
and a travelogue all taking place in a remote region that
had probably not seen a human being for months. While
there was not even a thought to eating one another--and
for that matter the wolves that attacked them seemed simply
to be defending their territory since they made no attempt
to make nutritive value of these fellows--there is nothing
particularly original thematically. Instead we in the
audience are asked to consider how we would cope with
fellow survivors if we were caught in an area surrounded
by wolf dens with blizzards threatening to put out the
fires that were started in an attempt to avoid freezing
to death and to keep the lycan-like creatures away.
Liam Neeson stars John Ottway as the putative leader of
the group, the guy who at first is resented for his knowledge
of the ways of the wolves. Much of the time that he is
working on the rig--we actually see him at night as the
men entertain themselves by brawling, which is a way of
foreshadowing how they will act after the crash--he dreams
of his wife or girlfriend who had succumbed to a dread
disease.
Ottway tries to get the group of survivors
to work together and to relinquish they macho postures.
One fellow insists that he is not scared, never scared,
to which Ottway replies that he is "terrified."
One by one the survivors are killed, by wolves, drowning,
falling, heart attack, knee injury making walking impossible.
This is a film to watch not so much
because of the predictable story but because of the scenery
and performances by Neeson, Dermot Mulroney, Frank Grillo,
James Badge Dale, Joe Anderson and Nonso Anozie. It's
a testosterone flick, the only women being the hostess
on the doomed airliner and the love of Ottway's life seen
in flashbacks.
Rated R. 117 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Elizabeth Banks and Sam Worthington
Asger Leth's
Man On Ledge
Opens Friday, January 27, 2012
Screenwriter: Pablo F. Fenjves
Starring: Elizabeth Banks, Sam Worthington,
Jamie Bell, Edward Burns, Kyra Sedgwick, Ed Harris, Anthony
Mackie
Summit Entertainment
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
As an action-adventure movie, Man
on a Ledge only succeeds partly: by providing some
tension when an ex-cop who has been convicted of the crime
of stealing a $40 million diamond goes out on the ledge
of New York's Roosevelt Hotel 25 stories in the air. The
trouble is that much of the action--particularly the busy
goings-on across the street from which the title man on
a ledge wants to distract the police--remains stable when
it should be ratcheted up. That's not all: the dialogue
is as corny as Kansas in August, the young woman who serves
as hostage negotiator has hair that always remains in
place from the time she is awakened, there is only one
newscaster providing visuals to the adventure in our city
of eight million, and we find out early on that there
is little chance that the man will plunge to his death.
The movie, which is directed by documentarian
Asger Leth whose Ghosts of Cité Soleil
deals with gangs in that Haitian slum, finds Nick Cassidy
(Sam Worthington) near the beginning of a 25-year sentence
for stealing the diamond from its owner, real estate tycoon
David Englander (Ed Harris). He is determined to prove
his innocence. Escaping from Sing Sing prison in upstate
New York, he checks into the Roosevelt Hotel under the
name of Joe Walker, wipes all the prints from his room
where he has eaten what could be taken as his last meal,
and climbs out on ledge, quickly encouraging an audience
of hundreds who seem split 50/50 on whether he should
jump. Cop Jack Dougherty (Ed Burns) arrives on the scene
trying to talk the man out of jumping only to agree to
bring in hostage negotiator Lydia Mercer (Elizabeth Banks),
who feels guilty for failing to prevent a rookie cop's
descent off the Brooklyn Bridge a month earlier.
Among the implausible notions is Cassidy's
ultimatum: that if Lydia Mercer does not show up within
one half hour, he would jump. He even gets the count-down
to ten seconds, albeit slowly, though he has no idea that
Mercer is already in the room ready to go out herself
on the ledge. What would he do if she had not dressed
so quickly?
Much of the action takes place across
the street where Cassidy's loyal brother, Joey (Jamie
Bell) and his girlfriend Angie (Genesis Rodriguez) are
into a mission-impossible act to find the evidence needed
to exonerate Nick. The hostile banter between the two,
who if caught could wind up in Sing Sing for a dozen years,
is yet another implausibility, just as the friendlier
dialogue between Nick and Lydia becomes tiresome, perhaps
encouraging the movie audience to yell "jump"
as well.
The film may have been inspired by an
incident involving John William Ware, a twenty-six-year-old
native of Southampton, NY, who committed suicide on July
26, 1938. He leaped from a window ledge of the seventeenth
floor of the Gotham Hotel at 5th Avenue and 55th Street
in Manhattan. He was the son of a Long Island express
agent, his eleven-hour dilemma before jumping having held
three hundred New York City police officers at bay.
Rated PG-13. 102 minutes (c) 2012
by Harvey Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Oren Moverman's
Rampart
Opens Friday, February 10, 2012
Screenwriter: James Ellroy, Oren Moverman
Cast: Woody Harrelson, Robin Wright,
Sigourney Weaver, Ice Cube, Ned Beatty, Cynthia Nixon,
Anne Heche, Brie Larson
Millennium Entertainment
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
There's really only one reason to see
Rampart, but it's a good enough one--and that's the
awards-worthy performance of Woody Harrelson in the role
of a dirty cop. The L.A.-based police drama that may well
have been inspired by the Rodney King affair is murky--a
downer with a plot that is repetitive, spinning on in
a circular way to put us firmly into the mind of the rogue
cop, Dave Brown (Woody Harrelson) who is coming apart
at the seams both on his beat and within his strange family.
The major part of Bobby Bukowski's filming is dark and
sometimes dizzying. The neighborhood is bleak and appears
riddled with crime, which is all Dave Brown needs to know
to release his macho style on everyone he meets. He is
so controlling that he even forces a rookie cop in the
precinct to eat the fries that she orders, despite her
insistence that she is watching her cholesterol. (Never
mind the burger that she downs, though the whole scene
may be Woody Harrelson's sending up of his own raw-food
shtick, having had a role in a DVD about reversing diabetes
by eschewing the gas range: the end-credits list his personal
nutritionist.)
Dave Brown is a veteran police officer
with the L.A.P.D., though despite twenty-four years with
the department he wears only two stripes--which probably
means that he's merely a corporal with a little supervisory
authority within the precinct. Perhaps because of his
low rank after all that service or maybe because of his
criminal actions on the force, Brown is brutal to alleged
criminals and, with his own family, a bad husband (consecutively)
to two sisters (Cynthia Nixon and Anne Heche). He believes
it's OK to put away the bad guys for good, which is why
he killed an alleged serial date-rapist--giving him the
nickname in the precinct of Date Rape, which his confused
older daughter (Brie Larson) uses to address him. Accused
by one of his ex-wives of ruining the lives of the two
daughters, he is in even greater trouble with his police
unit, investigated by the D.A. (Steve Buscemi) and the
assistant D.A. Joan Confrey (Sigourney Weaver), and pursued
by internal affairs officer Kyle Timkins (Ice Cube). Yet
because he projects the image of "all man,"
he scores with the women he hits on in bars including
Linda Fentress (Robin Wright) who he believes may be setting
him up, and is given shady advice by his mentor, Hartshorn
(Ned Beatty) who may also be stabbing him in the back.
General Terry (Ben Foster), a homeless man in a wheelchair
who witnessed one of Brown's murders, believes he is owed
special favors by the cop as well.
Director Oren Moverman, whose The
Messenger (which also featured Ben Foster, Woody
Harrelson and Steve Buscemi) looked in upon a pair of
military men who visit the families of soldiers killed
in action, does allow us some sympathy for a cop who is
his own worst enemy, as when we watch Dave Brown privately
consider suicide while publicly refusing responsibility
for his extreme behavior. Moverman, using a script he
co-wrote with James Ellroy, does well in featuring Harrelson
in virtually every scene, an actor whose charisma commands
attention even in a slow-moving drama that is a downer
all the way.
Rated R. 112 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Daniel Espinosa's
Safe House
Opens Friday, February 10, 2012
Screenwriter: David Guggenheim
Starring: Denzel Washington, Ryan Reynolds,
Brendan Gleeson, Liam Cunningham, Sam Shepard, Vera Farmiga
Universal Pictures/ Relativity Media
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
You've got nifty car chases, car crashes,
explosions, fist fights, loud gunfire, jumping from roof
to roof: what more can a movie lover ask for? Oh, there's
more: a top cast including the fabulous Denzel Washington,
who can do no wrong, handsome Ryan Reynolds who knows
how to grimace and sweat and bleed when he's in pain,
some sinister looking people with big guns who never smile
or joke, a top CIA executive who shows he means business
by never raising his voice. There's some cool photography
of Capetown, South Africa, one slum of which can justify
an agent's plea that he be reassigned to Paris. I could
go on, but getting back to the first question: what more
can you ask for?
You could want some extended conversations:
more people get killed in midsentence than have been taken
out in any other movie I've seen. You could want subtlety
and nuance in writing. You could want a script that makes
a modicum of sense while still allowing enough of a twist
near the conclusion. You could ask that at least somebody,
anybody, might use a silencer on his gun because those
gunshots are loud, man. You could want to interview the
actors asking why they're so desperate for money that
they signed on to this picture--particularly Vera Farmiga,
who made a reputation by appearing in quite a few intelligent
films like Up in the Air and, to be released
later, A View from the Bridge. And is Sam Shepard,
who has written for us such imaginative plays as True
West and Curse of the Starving Class able to
keep a straight face throughout this mayhem? That's to
his credit.
The film, which bears not a smidgen
of originality--corrupt government officials, the aforementioned
noisy scenes, a shaky camera, a vicious manhunt--is largely
a two-actor thriller pitting Ryan Reynolds' Matt Weston
against Denzel Washington's Tobin Frost. Frost, a renegade
CIA operative who has betrayed his country by selling
secrets to the enemy, is being pursued by a motley crew
of assassins and government officials who seek information
to which Frost is privy. When a safe house in Capetown
is invaded by people who want Frost alive, Matt Weston
is directed by CIA headquarters in Langley, Virginia,
to transport him under handcuffs to another location.
If he can do this successfully, he can say goodbye to
Capetown, hello Paris. Thoroughly bloodied by not bent,
Matt Weston, who plays straight man to Tobin Frost's wiseacre,
did not know how lucky he had been when he was going nuts
as a safe house caretaker whose only function was to look
at four walls and throw a ball back and forth.
Safe House lovers might change
their affections if they looked back at some of the great
spy movies of yesteryear, particularly Sydney Pollack's
Three Days of the Condor (The CIA knows him as
Condor. What he knows about the CIA could make him an
endangered species.) Sound familiar? Safe House
could actually make one relish even a confused and confusing
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. It's quiet.
Rated R. 115 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

McG’s
This Means War
Opens Friday, February 17, 2012
Written by Timothy Dowling, Simon Kinberg,
story by Dowling, Marcus Gautesen.
Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Chris
Pine, Tom Hardy, Til Schweiger, Angela Bassett, Rosemary
Harris, Chelsea Handler, Abigail Leigh Spencer.
20th Century Fox
Reviewed by Frank J. Avella
Tom Hardy keeps proving he can
do just about anything and mesmerize. Even a Hollywood
mash-up that wants to be hip but ultimately—in the
final reel--becomes the same safe, irritating paint-by-numbers
bullshit Hollywood pic.
This Means War is a genre blended
romantic comedy/action thriller. And for quite a while
it is actually sweet, intriguing and fun mostly due to
its terrific trio of lead actors. It’s a Valentine’s
Day offering that wants so desperately to be that one
movie that both sexes can go to and enjoy. But in the
end, instead of pursuing something original and distinct,
it relies too much on the tried and true—which has
become quite stale and migraine inducing.
Reese Witherspoon delights as Lauren,
a product researcher, who gets involved with two men who
happen to be best friends and co-workers (covert CIA agents,
actually). Chris Pine is the cad who can’t commit
to women but loves to seduce them. Tom Hardy is the lovable
romantic with the ex-wife and child, who is looking for
a real relationship. The romantic portion of the plot
involves Lauren getting to know each of them and deciding
which one is for her. You don’t have to be a fan
of Katherine Heigl movies to guess this outcome in the
first 20 minutes.
The action plot involves….ah,
who cares! It’s silly, confused and only there,
seemingly, to lure the tween boy demographic.
Fault the McG for everything wrong with
the film. He’s the director responsible for the
cacophonous mess that was Terminator Salvation.
And give credit to the valiant threesome
for creating sparks from near-nothing; each brings surprising
depth to their flimsy roles.
The rest of the ensemble is wasted including
Angela Bassett who deserves so much better.
Chelsea Handler, who is one of the funniest
women on TV, seems to be trying way too hard to shock
in her scenes. I don’t blame her. I blame a terrible
director who either didn’t bother directing her
or chose all the worst takes.
SPOILER ALERT
This Means War has the dubious
distinction of boasting the most market-research-infested
ending of any film I have seen in eons. The last ten minutes
feels like a series of rewrites and reshoots to make certain
no moviegoer could possibly be offended and that each
character would enjoy some kind of happy ending. The result
negates most of the charm the actors worked so hard to
achieve. McG’s treats his films as commodities,
which makes him a whore to the studio system.
The worst affront is the last-minute
revelation that Lauren did not sleep with both guys—the
one thing that gave the film an edgy fascination beyond
its limited trappings. God forbid she should be seen (by
middle America, of course) as a slut. Because any female
willing to sleep with two different at the same time must
be the whore of Babylon, right?
There are moments in the film where
the lovely Witherspoon seems to be staring at the camera
wondering what style she should play. Alas, McG was probably
too concerned with reaction cards to give her any direction.
Hiromasa Yonebayashi's
(English version by Gary Rydstrom)
The Secret World of Arrietty
Opens Friday, February 17, 2012

Hiromasa Yonebayashi,
English version by Gary Rydstrom
The Secret World of Arrietty
Opens Friday, February 17, 2012
Screenwriter: Hayao Miyazaki, Keiko
Niwa, English version by Karey Kirkpatrick from Mary Norton's
"The Borrowers"
Cast: Voices of Bridgit Mendler, Amy
Poehler, David Henrie, Moises Arias, Will Arnett, Carol
Burnett
Walt Disney Pictures
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
A delightful book, The Borrowers
by Mary Norton published in 1953, is now a lavish movie
with Japanese style animation splashed with the colors
of the rainbow. The Borrowers, which posits that
tiny people live hidden form humankind beneath the floors
of a quiet country house in England, gets a Japanese production
which, for the benefit of Westerners has been translated
into English by Gary Rydstrom. A few changes have taken
place: we do not see some of the loot "borrowed"
from "human beans" such as postage stamps for
paintings and matchboxes for storage; or a small pair
of Turkish bloomers made from two glove fingers for what
Mary Norton states are for "knocking about in the
mornings." Nor does the boy that comes to live in
the country house have a pet ferret.
The big fear of the tiny people, is
that one of them, the cute title character Arrietty, had
allowed herself to be seen by the 14-year-old boy: first
by accident when bounding about in the garden, then by
the lonely lad's coaxing her as she stands outside his
bedroom window.
The story centers on a tiny family living
under the floorboards of the home for years, taking things
that they say the humans will not miss such as a single
cube of sugar or a piece of cheese--just enough to survive.
They're a nomadic group, forced to change locations whenever
spotted by the enemy (that's us). Arrietty changes her
mind about at least one human being when the boy and she
become friends. At the risk of scaring some of the small
fry in the audience, the G-rated movie contains dialogue
such as "we all have to die some time" and the
fact that the boy has something wrong with his heart and
will go into surgery in a week. (Why is that dialogue
necessary?)
Using Studio Ghibli technology emanating from Koganei,
Tokyo, whose work Spirited Away is best known
in the U.S., we see such delights as Arrietty's mother
pouring a single drop of tea in a tiny teacup--which is
later used to transport the family across the water to
a new home. For self-defense, Arrietty carries what to
us looks like a simple pin but in her sheath it is a fearsome
sword--which she can use against grasshoppers who tower
above her in height.
Arrietty's mother is an overprotective
nag who regularly fears for her daughter's safety, while
the human housekeeper takes on the role of the evil woman
who at one point captures Arreitty's mom and places her
in a jar to prove to the family that she was right all
along about the existence of the little ones.
The designers do well in creating characters
to scale: the borrowers look convincingly shorter than
the human family, but both groups are given interesting,
though literal dialogue. There are no Shrek-style wisecracks
or words put in for the benefit of the old timers in the
audience.
Bridgit Mendler takes on the role of
Arrietty's voice while other characters are given human
dimensions by Amy Poehler, Carol Burnett, Will Arnett,
David Henrie, and Moises Arias.
Rated G. 94 minutes (c) 2012 by Harvey
Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online

Jill Sprecher's
Thin Ice
Opens Friday, February 17, 2012
Screenwriter: Jill Sprecher, Karen
Sprecher
Cast: Greg Kinnear, Billy Crudup, Lea
Thompson, Alan Arkin, David Harbour, Bob Balaban
ATO Pictures
Reviewed for New York Cool by Harvey
Karten
The other day Jon Stewart's guest on
the comedian's The Daily Show was Brad Pitt.
After announcing his name, the audience burst into sustained
applause, to which Jon replied (comically) "No, not
that Brad Pitt: he's an insurance salesman in Poughkeepsie."
Insurance salesmen, then, are in a categorywith dentists
and accountants, presumably professions peopled primarily
by dorks. The salesman in Jill Sprecher's Thin Ice,
however, is anything but a dork, though by the time some
of the people he meets do him harm he'd be happy if being
a dork was the worst thing that could have happened to
him.
Greg Kinnear is perfectly cast with
a role that suits his personality to a T, that of a conniving
insurance salesman, Mickey Prohaska, who has been spending
too much time in hotels because he is separated from his
wife, Jo Ann. He is enough of scammer to make us realize
that when he tries to get back with her, sweet-talking
his way into her bed, his only concern is to save money
previously spent on hotels. Mickey gives motivational
speeches advising his audience to ask people for the time
as a way to start conversations that would inevitably
lead to selling policies. He sees an easy victim--a slightly
senile man in his eighties named Gorvy Hauer (Alan Arkin)--and
looks forward to selling him a policy on his house not
realizing that the man asked him over principally to have
someone to talk to and to fix his TV set. The plot advances
when a locksmith (Billy Crudup) arrives to install an
alarm system, which would pay for itself by lowering Hauer's
premiums.
By the time loose strings are tied up--and
there are enough strings here to warrant a considerable
work force of boy scouts or sailors--we get the message
that this conniver could use peace of mind a lot more
than the money he expects to get. Once a murder takes
place right in Hauer's shack, implicating Mickey as an
accessory, Mickey might have almost wished he were an
honest man.
The ambiance will remind cinephiles
of the broad stretches of ice in Fargo. Thin
Ice is filmed in Minnesota where, production notes
state, the temperature often hit ten below, yet a sartorially
splendid Mickey ambles about in the open air without a
hat or gloves while others are covering almost in every
inch of flesh with wool. This noir tale with heavy comic
touches is exquisitely cast--friend of Hauer, Mickey's
wife, Mickey's new employee, locksmith, and a none-too-friendly
mutt named Pete. The writer-director team of the Sprecher
sisters, whose Clockwatcers (1997) pits two temps
against a full-time staff, benefit from Dick Pope's good
looking widescreen camera work and Alex Wurman and Bela
Fleck's music. If there are too many coincidences to make
the big twist plausible, that's a small caveat for a film
with an ending that only a few in the audience will see
coming.
Rated R. 94 minutes (c) 2012 by
Harvey Karten, Member, New York Film Critics Online
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